Dear Lady Barnes,

Being a role model to many I am often asked for advice and bits of wisdom regarding my social graces. I am always happy to offer tips to my peers so I am kicking off my blog with a letter from a friend regarding a recent dilemma;

Dear Lady Barnes,

Seeing as how you just started a blog, I thought you might have some advice for me. This isn't exactly advice for the lovelorn but hmm well you'll see.

I got invited to the grand opening of my tenant's escort establishment. And she told me she has a room with 25 balls in it. Now these are *those* kind of balls. So the thing I need to know is, what to wear?

Like I'm standing outside Barnes' display with the men's underwear right now. Should I have the underwear just in case? Like, first have something to kinda strip too...then ease into it? Or would that be uncool? But then what? Really, what SHOULD I wear? Do you think I need to get a prim dick?

I want to do the right thing here and I'm sure there's some netiquette involved so please help me out, and be detailed you know, for before, during, after kinda stuff.

Kisses,

Random Unsung

Dear Random Unsung,

An excellent question, one I have to ask myself all the time. "What should I wear?" is something you should ask yourself before any social function. Regardless of the occasion there is always fashion do's and don'ts!

Sex ball parties are always a conundrum considering whatever you decide to wear will be coming off shortly anyway. So it is important for it to be memorable and impactful. Many of us use our outer vestments as a way to express who we are, since these will be shed quickly you want your message to be clear, who you are and what you want. In a situation like this undergarments sound appropriate attire to arrive in. Revealing, but leaves at least something to the imagination. These can then be removed when the 'fun' begins! Also underwear would be appropriate attire for after the 'fun' has been completed; usually they have a small reception with cocktails and little weenies afterwards.

Being as this is a client of yours you will want to portray an image of professionalism. Meeting and interacting with clients is important for ones business, even if their social get-togethers are, well, this kind. Just make sure you stay in your own comfort level, don't wear something that will make you uncomfortable or portray an image contrary to what you are.

A prim penis would probably be an appropriate if not a necessary accessory to a sex ball party. Personally, I would advice against the new texture penis that has been offered as an alternative and worn as a tattoo, they are quite frankly a little too flat and well... a little too little for SL. Might as well go for the porn star size if its all fantasy, even if realistically your partner would need stitches after the deed. However, as far as tattoos, a sex ball party is the perfect opportunity to show off your tattoos or even your latest photo-realistic skin.

Hope that helps!

XOXO Lady Barnes